Resignation from Singapore

Yes, I resign from that school in Singapore. But, it doesn't mean I quit from fashion design.

Long time ago, I thought I could cope myself there. I was confident that I could enjoy my school there until graduate.

But, the fact was different from my mind. I never thought it was that stressful. I was trying to achieve the best and working as hard as I could until I didn't have fun anymore. In the end, I scared a lot, everyday. I lost myself. My head was stuck. I couldn't design properly, I hurt myself. My creativity, my confidence, they were all gone. All of my friends avoided me. Probably just from couch surfing (even I just visited them once or twice). It was full of pressure. I cried everyday. I lost my weight, always down. I experienced 3 to 4 of 6 symptoms of break down. The worst part, I almost didn't trust God anymore.

In the end, I quit from there. I couldn't handle the pressure.

But, one thing for sure. I don't blame the school. I blame myself because working way to hard and being immature.

After the lecturers heard of my resignation, they immediately called me and asking of my resignation after all they see my projects. But, at least they really opened to me. If I need to ask something, I could ask them :)

The night after I sign the withdrawal form, one of my couch surfing friends text-ed me and say "hey, can you design something for me?". I was completely shocked and didn't know what to answer. He knew I resigned. I still had some depressions that time and my head was still stuck. But, I said yes and he briefed me through e-mail.

I went back to Jakarta on 30 Oct, 2011. I designed for my friend and he accepted it. It was a miracle for me. I really thought that I couldn't design anymore, but I was wrong.

In Jakarta wasn't easy as well, I need to face my friends and my family and answer about my resignation. My family understands but my friends mostly said it was a pity that I resign from one of the top design school in Singapore. It's hard to face and answer those questions when my parents have to lie that "she was homesick, so she came back" when ppl asked them about this. I COULD'T HANDLE THE PRESSURE that is the reason. I told my parents to tell them the truth 'cause it hurts so much to hold that feeling. And they did. The hardest part when if ppl ask me, my mind will go back to those horrible past and I cried if I think bout it when I'm alone. That's why I don't regret a single thing about my resignation.

I didn't graduate high school, I only finished my 1st year of high school and went to Singapore. When you're in primary, secondary, and high school, yes, grades are important. Now I realize, in University, grades; just put'em in secondary part; the primary part is networking. That's my biggest mistake since I was in Singapore.

Lecturers, they are actually cool people.

My friends in Singapore, some I still have contact with them, but mostly I lost contact with them. Probably because I ruined "Indonesian" name from there. *joke*

But, I still hoping for the best for them and good luck.

Now, I'm still scared if I have to meet my friends from my former school in Singapore. But, I'm going to fight.

"This is a battle between myself and myself. God is my coach, it's up to me weather to follow His instructions or not. But I have to liaoo"

You can say to me, "Lydia, you're such immature to post this in your blog blah blah blah cuihhhh." I don't mind, it's your rights to comment.

Narcism

Narcissus was a man that in love with himself. So, I took the meaning of it, being in love is the same like proud of yourself (from my point of view). It encouraged myself to be proud of myself here in Singapore. In Jakarta, I almost always not proud of myself. This time, I really want to feel how to be proud of myself as myself.

I also was inspired by my narcism photo. One day, I took a pic of myself on a bus, it was blurry

inspiration:

Nyasar ep. 2 - Singapore Botanical Garden, Peranakan Museum, and Victorian Style Architecture

Botanical garden: Braids

Peranakan Museum's brochure: "Batik"

Victorian style architecture: Silhouette

Nyasar ep. 1 - Good Beggining ft. Classics: Cruelty

Yes people, I'm in SINGAPORE for a brand new start. Well, on my second day, I went to a hospital for MCU, one thing that I was afraid of was scared of having no friends. But I was so wrong. I met lots of friends here. :) I had a very good beginning. That's why I'm using bright color on the bottom to express it.

After the MCU, I went for a walk without any destination. Then I saw a building like blocks, so yeah, I took it for my inspiration on the dress. And the gray color, I got it from the rusty door knob from my new place and the reflection of the unpredictable future.

after that, I mix those inspiration above with "cuk" (young mosquitoes) that was trap in water drop on the wall (geez, I deleted the inspiration's photo). That's why I used the nets. :)

Cancelation of Temporary Closing Down of Lyd's Designs

Well, I guess I'm canceling my plan to close down this baby for a while. So, I will update my designs like I usually do. Maybe more (well, I heard that the lecturer likes to reject designs, so I can post them here)

Dear viewers,

First of all, I would like to say thank you for all of your supports to me and Lyd's Designs.

I really do appreciate it.

The reason I make this notice is because I'm leaving Jakarta for Singapore to study Fashion Design. Due to my studies, I'm afraid that I couldn't update this blog as much as it's used to. But, I'll try my best to update this blog even only once in 2 months or so. I will also try my best to make a better Lyd's Designs in the future. Please look forward to it

Thank you.

Monday, July 4th 2011

M.V.Lydia

Creator of Lyd's Designs

Classics: Tudung Saji

Classic means something that will be used again in the future.

In my mind, many people have used a thing called "Tudung Saji" to cover up the food from flies. Even some times they use fabrics to decorate them. I don't know in other countries, but in Indonesia, it's very common. So that's why, I used "Tudung Saji" silhouette, some ruffles (from the fabrics that Indonesian use to decorate them), and batik.

Zip It

Inspiration:

- Mr.Bowler Hat's style (the bad guy from Disney Picture's "Meet the Robinsons")

- NAFA's CF

- "Zip it!" Raven (from Disney's "That's So Raven")

1. This is a man body

2. This design is used for women's and men's wear

Moving

And yes readers, when I design something like this, it means that my heart is broken.

Trying to move forward when your heart torn apart is like walking on a fiery road. Painful. But, the earth never stop rotating from the east to the west. never rotate back. A samurai always stand strong and keep moving forward even though his heart is full of regrets.

11 June 2011

I confessed my feelings to the person I like. It felt good, but at the same time, it felt very painful. I messed up. I tried my best to move forward. Even 'till now. I was almost tied up.

15 June 2011

In the end, I won the battle against my broken heart. Even though, I was still sick. It felt like losing hope for living.

"Sudah, jalani saja, Dek.. (Just keep moving)" said my mom.

The earth won't rotate from the west to the east. Even how much you've prayed to rotate it back, it won't happen. Even though with regret and broken heart, you still have to keep moving forward.

This message is the concept of this design. This is my personal "Samurai".

Help

I'm trying to be a warrior, trying to be everyone's shield, trying to be strong. But, deep inside me, I need help. I'm messed up.

5 June 2011, someone confess his feelings to me.

In maths, I can help myself solving and cracking problems.

In love, I even can't solve single problem of it.

I tried to be strong, trying to be friends with him. I thought it was easy as it said.

"Let's just be friends, okay?"

easy when it's written, but not easy in real life.

I'm screwed. Losing a friend is more painful than losing a lover.

If "him" read this, I really appreciate your feelings. I still want us to be friends. I know I made a mistake before. I know I broke your heart. I wish I could fix this. I know I'm childish to write this on my blog because I'm still a child-hearted girl.

To all people: I need you, friend, to make a better force. I can't stand alone.

Samurai

Samurai..

When I heard that word, I remembered the definition itself when I was a little girl. My sister told me that "Samurai" was an immortal and strong japanese warrior.

I remembered one of the Cartoon Net's shows, "Samurai Jack", Jack was a samurai that was sucked into another dimension. He fought until the end, never gave up, and stood strong, even though he was in pain and in total mess. He was still searching for help, even though the helper wasn't a human being.

This time, I want to deliver my own "Samurai" to you.

This time, the "Samurai" is personal.

花 - Untitled

ps: I don't know where this inspiration came from, maybe from my unconsciousness. LOL

花 - Indonesia's True Beauty

On the beginning of May, I went to Mt.Geulis for camping. During the morning of the second day, my friends and I went for tracking in the rice fields and villages. It was stunning. I felt very calm. The best part is the view! There were flowers, villagers, chickens, children, rice fields, adventure, etc. There were dynamic atmosphere there. I said to myself, "Wow, I'm in love with this thing! This is the real beauty of Indonesia that you'll NEVER find anywhere in this world. This is the originality of Indonesia!"

The flowers represents the fields and on the back, there are rice stacks (?). I made the colors soft and strong at the same time to represent the elegance and the power of the villagers, especially the women. It also made of Jerami. The white slayer(?)'s motif comes from the chicken feather's motif that I saw during tracking. Last, the batik part means power of Indonesia.

This is what I'm in love with. This is my true love.

for the inspiration, check out these pics! (hopefully, the pics display the same thing what I'm hoping for)

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1954829265704&set=a.1954727943171.190576.1091872575&type=1&theater

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1954736143376&set=a.1954727943171.190576.1091872575&type=1&theater

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1988101900464&set=a.1988000257923.119574.1180802129&type=1&theater

Big thanks to Dion and Ricky.T for uploading the pics.

花 (Hana) - Spring in Beijing

15-23rd of Apr, I went to Beijing to visit my sist.

Things that caught my eyes are the flowers. They are blooming everywhere. The best part was, there were beautiful flowers with strong and soft colors everywhere. One day I saw a tree that had the same structure as Pohon Beringin. So, I made this design. :)

Also same with my heart, blooming everywhere because my big sist. Miss you sist! Thank you for showing the view!

Merapi: Recovery

We may have forgotten what happened to Merapi and its surroundings. They may have gotten stronger now. They may have recovered.

The flowers represents the "spring" feeling of Yogya (getting better) ;and for the golds, it represents the economical situation there which is getting back to normal.

I use batik because it represents Yogya, hhe..

Pray for INA, Pray for the world!!

Credits: Dion Oktavianus. thankyou so much for ur pics after the explosion. it inspired me a lot!! :)

Final act. Clown: The Confession of a Teenage Clown

Before the closing, let us give the audiences some laughs, shall we? *I always wanna say that

To be honest, I can be little bit (actually more crazy) sometimes. I have crazy thoughts sometimes, especially if I'm with my friends. :)
In this world, why so serious? Laugh out Loud ~ Just enjoy the colors and the love of your life especially if you guys are teenagers. Be yourselves!

inspiration:
- my inner craziness
- hair manual curler *I don't know what it's called XD

Act 4. Acrobatic (?): Flying Gracefully

I've seen this acrobatic shows for so many times. The performers seemed like they were flying. They were very graceful but yet have a strong power. The blue color was inspired by the lighting system during the show. :)

Act 3. Mime: The Mind of an Amateur Mime

Long time ago, when I was probably 9 or 10 years old, I watched "Dexter's Laboratory" which was aired in Cartoon Network and I saw DiDi, Dex's big sist, trying to be a mime by asking Dex "Am I inside or outside the box?" and showing her hand movement just like she was inside the box. And yes people, this experience is my inspiration

Act 2. Ballerina: Ambitious to Reach the Top = Frustration

I describe myself as an ambitious person. I always try my best to reach the top and win even though I won't get or even have the 1st place price. But, that's not always a good thing. It's frustrating. The most frustrating thing is that I can't stop doing things too serious. I almost couldn't enjoy my life. My life because my ambition is complicated.

Just like this design. It's complicated, just like a fan, never flat. Once it goes down, it always goes up again, never care what happen, always have thoughts that are unnecessary to be think of and makes things worse (ex: stress). The red represents the frustrating feelings that I have. The top of the skirt is reaching for the top.

This feeling reminds me of "Black Swan". Natalie Portman's role as a very ambitious ballerina wants to get the role of the white swan. Because of her ambitious attitude, she turns herself into a black swan.
So that is why I made this feeling of mine as a ballerina, just like Natalie's role.

Inspiration:
- my feeling
- Black Swan (movie)
- for the skirt, is this (Fan Palm)

Act 1. Magician: Almost There

7th January, 2011

I had love him for almost 5 months. It was sucks. I just wanted to focus on my studying. But in the end, I ended up loving him without being with him. That was heartbreaking.

So in the end, I TOLD him about my feelings through him. Well, I just wanna made this feelings disappeared.
He replied like this, "To be honest with you Lyd, I loved someone before I started studying here and after I started studying here. But, my dad doesn't allow me to date, and I found that at some point, he was right. I'm sorry that I broke your heart. and I'm glad and always be your best friend."

Even though that hurt my feelings little. I was glad that my feelings about him had gone. But still,...


9th January, 2011
But still, I didn't want to see him. I didn't want to be sad. I just wanted to be a blind girl to him.


Day by day, he was still close to me. Even until now. It was this close *tini tiny close* to winning. But, it was useless. I still love him. :(

I just remembered about a magician who was wrapped by "karung goni" and belts. She was almost there, there to released herself for reaching a greater freedom. But, it was a failure.

My inspirations about this design are:
- a Magician trick with "karung goni" and belts
- my feelings
- the almost-broken-belt came from the almost-broken-belt that I found in the school yard during "Kerja Bakti"

CARNAVAL - Before the show: Hidden Beauty

As the crowd gone wild, the host heat things up more. Then, he saw a beauty among the cowboys wearing an orange dress smiling at him softly.

CARNAVAL (advertisement)

CARNAVAL

-coming soon-

(M.V.Lydia)

Beauty of Asia - Lydia's Sweet a Year before Seventeen

Do you guys remember this design?

(Chinese Soldier by Lyd's Designs)

And this one?

(Sunset in Bali by Lyd's Designs)

Well, February 19, 2011, I celebrated my Sweet 16. So, for the present, I asked my mom to make my designs Real.
So, that day, the theme of my FIRST FASHION SHOW was

"BEAUTY OF ASIA"

which was inspired from what I've seen during my travels to Tibet, China, India (I haven't went there), Bali (Indonesia), and Japan.

And 2 sketches above were two of them. The "Chinese Soldier" represented China and "Sunset in Bali" represented Indonesia (which was Bali)

ps: these photos bellow were taken by an amateur photographer (my uncle, Irwan Makinto and my cousin, Gerard Ivander (and also Edgar Makinto), Thank you for shooting them), so if you have hard time seeing these pictures clearly, I'm sorry. Hopefully the professional one took the pics :)

Tibet (sketch will be shown later)
ps: since my uncle (or) my cousin didn't take the picture, you will see it below for the details.



Model: Ivana Nirjana (my sist)
Photographer: my uncle :)


China






Sketch is shown above, "Chinese Soldier"
Fabrics: Maroon Tafetta, Golden Lamay, black Chinese Buttons, Chinese traditional Fabric (Black), and white thin Aux Fur (artificial fur), Chinese coins, golden chains, red ribbon, white fabric (I don't know what kind it is)
Model: Indah Christina (my senior)
Photographer: my uncle

India (Sketch will be shown later)





I was inspired by a modern and traditional lady in India. Also the colors of Love.
Fabrics: Pink Songket, purple Tafetta (?), Pink and peach chiffon, golden India plates.
Model: Riniwati M. (my mom)
Photographer: my uncle

Bali






(Front)


(Back)

Sketch is shown above, "Sunset in Bali"
Fabrics: Orange, Red, and Green Songket, Grey Batik, Orange yellowish Tafetta, Tile, White chiffon, Golden large plain plates
Model: Felisia Nirjana (my cousin)
Photographer: my uncle


Japan (sketch will be shown later, it was left at the tailor)





This is my FIRST design for man.
I was inspired by the modern Japanese school boys uniform, Gakuran. But I kind of modified it and add some chains.
Model: Oki Prakarsa (my cousin)
Photographer: my uncle

My dress


(Sketch)


(Front)


(Back)


(Details on the back)


(Yes madamme and monseur, I wore this dress! :) )


Here are some more pictures









Thank you so much for your support :)
God Bless you all

Credits (thanks to):
Designer: Maria Valentine Lydia (owner and designer of Lyd's Designs)
Tailors: Riniwati M (my mother) and Pak Chandra (taylor at Pasar Benhil, Jakarta, Indonesia)
Models:
1. Ivana Nirjana - Tibet
2. Indah Christina - China
3. Riniwati M - India
4. Felisia N - Bali
5. Oki Prakarsa - Japan
Photographers: Irwan M (my uncle) and Gerard and Edgar (my cousins)
Peninsula Hotel
Fashion Guru: Mrs. Yani Koentjoro and Miss Patricia (from Phalie Studio)

Dream Date on NYE

This design is part of I FEEL, I Design

Yeah, I'm single. Sometimes, I always wanting a date. But I hate dating. Well, here's the inspiration:

I was dreaming a date on NYE. During that date, we watch the fire works sparked at the beautiful night sky at the coast. My date, he made my heart shines

Modern Selir Keraton

Inspired by the glamour of the lady keraton

Barcode Detected: 6L4M0U12

Inspiration:

Chinese Soldjier

I was inspired by the soldjiers' outfit from the 30 Seconds to Mars' new music video: From Yesterday.
Thankyou so much 30 Seconds to Mars. <3 <3 Lyd :)